Posted by Sarah and Dawn
Sarah: I have no idea what this is about.
Dawn: I do. It’s a John Shiban, so that means Monster of the Week. And boy is this one is fucked, so let’s just get to it.
All gifs for this recap belong to Peter Capaldi. Irritated Peter Capaldi. Disapproving Peter Capaldi. Fuckity swearing fuck Peter Capaldi. YOU’LL SEE WHY. Also, swearing Peter Capaldi gifs might be our spirit animal, so expect a gif-heavy recap this time around. Go on and do it for us, Peter.
Season 1, Episode 15: The Benders
Written by: John Shiban
The Story So Far: Uh, nothing. Oddly, we get no background intro this time. Curious. But you know the drill. Two brothers, hunting monsters, dysfunctional relationship with Dad, salting and burning, shotguns, Impala, classic rock, blah blah blah. On to the ep.
Chyron says Hibbing, Minnesota. A young kid is sitting in bed, blankets pulled up to his chest. Growly noises are coming from the TV. We see a tiny Godzilla figure on the mantle, and so let’s go out on a limb and guess that the famous Japanese monster is responsible for the noise. Little horror movie kid is distracted by a squeaky engine and hops out of bed to play Peeping Tom. He sees a guy carrying garbage bags across a parking lot to a dumpster. Ominously. Like he’s a bad guy, but since this is SPN, he’s more likely a deadshirt. And a REALLY stupid one, at that. GarbageBag!Deadshirt hears something skittering in a dark parking lot, goes to check LIKE AN IDIOT, and gets dragged under a car, screaming.
Flash forward to a displeased mom-type telling two men that her son has already told his story to police, and that the more he says his presumably-crazy story, the more he believes that it’s true. Mom clearly does not think it is true.
Cut to Sam and Dean, looking super hot in some sort of police uniforms…ooh, STATE police uniforms. They doff their cowboy hats to the sound of exploding ovaries everywhere, and encourage Evan, the skinny kid from the previous scene, to tell them what he saw.
Turns out Young Evan heard what sounded like a monster. Aaaand he’d been watching Godzilla vs Mothra. This excites Dean, who loves GvM more than the original Sammy likes the remake. Really, Sammy? We are disappointed.
Still, though, it’s a beautiful bonding moment and a sweet, simple way for the writers to keep communicating how close these two really are. Well done on that bit, Shiban. Appreciate that compliment. because it’s probably the only one you’re getting this recap. But still, well done. Even Capaldi approves. FOR NOW.
So the story mom doesn’t believe but that Evan is pretty darn earnest about this: Evan saw a monster grab Deadshirt!Mr. Jenkins and drag him underneath a car. It had a whining growl.. That is apparently a BIG SUPER CLUE, and all the brothers need to hear.
Cut to Kugel’s Keg, where Sam does Homework while Dean plays darts. Sam notes that Daddy Dearest has marked the area in Scary Demonbits. Seems the whole place is a hotbed of missing persons, but they can’t tell if it’s their sort of gig. Sam wants to get to the Motel of the Week, which he saw five miles back. Dean wants another beer but decides to let it go, though not without busting his brother’s balls at least a little. Dean needs to take a leak, so “Grandma” Sam ventures outside. Alone. In the foggy dark. In a hotbed of missing persons activity. Way to go, Sammy. To the surprise of no one, he hears similar sounds to the ones Mr. Jenkins did. And, like Jenkins, Sam goes to investigate. Remember when Sam was smart?
But hey, no worries! It’s just a pissy ginger cat! Sam has a chuckle but his relief is short lived, which we know because the camera shows us his feet. Almost as if we are looking at them from underneath a car…
By the time Dean comes out of the bar, Sam is gone. Pissy ginger cat is there. Scary Demonbits is there. Baby is there. But no Sammy. Well, shit, son. Cue the ominous string section.
Sarah: VERY OMINOUS STRINGS is the name of my next band.
Dawn: Your first single should be Pissy Ginger Cat Knows Better Than You, Sam.
Dean is ever so slightly panicked, and is asking total strangers if they’ve seen his brother. No dice. He looks around (taking in some nearby security cameras) but sees nothing but fog. It’s clear he’s worried sick.
The next morning, Dean chats up a pretty police officer, still under the guise of his Alias of the Week. Frankly, we are amazed he waited until the next morning, but then he probably spent all night exhausting his own pretty impressive investigatory skills, so cops are the only option. He says he’s not there to investigate the Jenkins case. It’s his….cousin. Yah, his cousin, see? And they were out drinking and he disappeared, see?
Officer Skeptical thinks perhaps Sam is an alcoholic. Dean insists that Sam was taken. Officer Skeptical is actually Officer Helpful, and sits down with “Greg Washington” to investigate Sam Winchester. What she learns is that Dean is dead, according to medical records, and was suspected of murder. Dean nods knowingly, because that Dean Winchester sure was the black sheep of the family, doncha know. “Handsome though,” he adds helpfully.
Modest too. So nice that Dean keeps what’s really important in sight.
Officer Helpful née Skeptical does the usual checking of the usual databases. Dean wants to use the county traffic cameras to see who (or what) took Sammy. Officer HnS wants him to fill out a missing persons report. Dean’s not so down with that. He knows the county has a terrible track record with missing persons. Sam, he insists, “is coming back. I’m bringing him back.” His face is kinda inarguable. Look:
Dawn needs a moment, because Season 10 actually starts next week and Holy Mother of Sin, Dean looks so YOUNG in this episode. They’re just babies! Disturbed, dysfunctional, criminal babies.
Meanwhile, in what we can only presume is another part of Evillll, Minnesota, Sammy wakes up in an iron cage. He can’t stand fully upright and he’s in the dark. He shakes the bars a bit, determines that he can’t get out just yet, and looks around. He spots another unconscious prisoner — NotQuiteDeadshirt!Mr. Jenkins.
Also, it’s nice that Sammy looks a bit like, “Oh, a dark cage. Must be Thursday.”
Back in the light of day, Officer HnS has pulled the traffic camera reports, which show a rusty old camper with brand new plates. She and Dean agree it must have been involved. Just then, Dean spots a rusty old van making a terrible whining growl.
“I’ll be damned.” says Dean.
“I’ll be double damned,” says Sarah, who thinks she knows where this is going.
“mumblehhphdamnedseason10mumble,” says Dawn, because her hands are clapped over her own mouth and she doesn’t want to spoil, sweetie.
Come on, Sammy! Prove us wrong. Kick the shit out of that cage and be somewhere slightly less invested in the latest reprint of To Serve Man.
Sadly, Sam’s kicking only serves to wake the other cage-tenant, who turns out to be the missing Mr. Jenkins. Anybody want to place bets on his odds? Here’s a hint — bet low. Really, really low. Jenkins the soon to be deadshirt thinks we’re in the country, as “it smells like the country.” Of course it does.
Sarah: I HATE obligatory cannibalism episodes (OCE), ever since I watched the “Countrycide” episode of Torchwood. People in cages in the country and dudes driving around in rusty old cars with new plates are pretty much all I need to believe that I’m watching SPN’s OCE. I really fucking hate episodes like this. I hate cannibals as much as I hate zombies (see: Sarah’s Very Sound Reasons for not watching Hannibal OR The Walking Dead.). Look out, SPN. Now I’m rage watching you.
THE MONSTERS ARE MEN. WOMP WOMP.
Dawn: It’s still not going to be worse than The X-Files “Home.” Because nothing can be. Rob Zombie couldn’t make a more disturbing backwoods cannibal story than that. No one can. There is none more disturbing than that. SARAH IS NEVER TO WATCH IT. EVER.
Sarah: I could write a book filled with reasons I am never going to watch it. Ever. Not to worry.
Now that we are temporarily done venting, back to our boys. Sam and Jenkins confer briefly. It’s clear Sammy still thinks monsters got him. Jenkins is a fucking pessimist, and he should be, because he is the last lamb to the slaughter before the bad guys get theirs, mark our words. Cannibals or no cannibals, ain’t nothing standing up to Big Brother Winchester, not after they took his Sammy. No fucking way.