Scandal
Season 3, Episode 10: “A Door Marked Exit”
Posted by Sage
I hope you were sufficiently Poped last week, readers. Because “A Door Marked Exit” was this season’s winter finale and we won’t be reunited with our associates until FEBRUARY. After the breathless action of last week – including that final shocking scene – this week’s episode slowed down (as much as Scandal EVER slows down) to show us the repercussions of everyone’s actions. And, in the process, it gave us some of the show’s finest monologues and performances. (JEFF PERRY. JEFF. PERRY.)
Let’s savor 2013’s final gif-cap together, shall we?
“You screwed his husband. That was poisoned fruit. And he will not rest until he has vengeance, YOU IDIOT.” I am the only one who’s still surprised that James and Douglas ACTUALLY did it? I thought for sure they were just setting up the photos to teach Cyrus a lesson.
“So I sold my soul to you and I propped you up and I played second fiddle and I smiled at every dinner and rally and fish fry and look where I got you.” Daniel is exhausted and totally done with playing the doting husband to “shrill Sally.” This will not end well.
“The devil came in. I lost myself and now I’m going to burn in the flames.” Please, Sally. As if anyone in this White House ever faces any consequences.
Cyrus is so overwhelmed that he pukes in Sally’s bathroom. At least we know his stomach has a conscience.
“I put a tracking chip where your tooth should be.” To those of you who ship this, still…you crazy. I support your right to ship what you wanna ship, but you should at least know that.
“You snooze, you lose.” Brian McKenzie’s character is SO CONFUSING to me. Obviously, he’s a complete sociopath. But does he have real feelings for Quinn?
Quinn yanks the tracking chip out of her mouth. There’s blood everywhere. She’s a bad bitch.
“That’s a matter of national security, and it’s above your pay grade, Mr. President.” Every time Fitz gets told, a White House intern gets its wings.
“Daniel Douglas died of a heart attack.” I feel like we’re gonna regret this lie at some point.
“I put parts of my body inside of your parts of your body and I’m very generous when…” TELL ME MORE ABOUT THIS, DAVID.
“I’m right here, ya’ll.” If I remember correctly, this Harrison’s ONLY LINE in this episode. SHONDA. WHAT DO YOU HAVE AGAINST HARRISON?
“Nobody touches him.” Luckily, the holy ghost steps into Sally right at the last moment she has to perpetrate this scheme. Looks like hellfire is staved off, just for a bit.
“God has smiled on us, Cyrus.” And Cyrus is like, “Mellie, we in danger, girl.”
“The devil came in…WE CAME IN. Ergo, we are the devil. I am actually…the devil.” After everything he’s done, THIS is Cyrus’s existential crisis moment.
Rowan wakes up in some dark recesses of the Pentagon. And Fitz is like….
“I’m screwing her, you know. Your daughter. The things I could tell you…about the way she tastes. She’s quite a girl. Talented.” FUCK. THIS. MAN.
“You’re funny. You’re a funny man. Or should I say, ‘boy.’ You’re a boy.” Ahhhhhhh, YES. Time to drop some truth bombs on the WORST PRESIDENT/WORST HUMAN ever.
“For you, it’s always summertime and the living is easy and your daddy is rich and your momma’s good looking.” Joe Morton is destroying this.
“I have fought and scrapped for every inch of ground I’ve walked on.”
“I MADE that happen. You cried yourself to sleep because daddy hurt your feelings.” I may have started clapping.
“You spoiled, entitled, ungrateful little brat.” MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ME.
“You could talk about what a great lay she is to try to get a response from me all you want, but guess what? I am ACTUALLY, quite literally above your pay grade.” *Doing Peanuts dance in front of television*
“You are always going to be Senator Grant’s disappointing boy Fitz. SHE is always going to be the FORMIDABLE Olivia Pope. Don’t use the person that I made to make you into a man. You’re a BOY.” This is everything. Everything. Thank you, Queen Shonda, for this moment.
“You disappoint me as a suitor for my daughter’s hand.” BOOM.
“She didn’t kill anyone. There’s no blood on her hands.” Hahahhahhaha, okay.
“I’m very sorry for your loss.” You can ACTUALLY feel the room’s temperature drop a few degrees when Mellie walks in.
“I am so hopeful for the future we’ll share together. Supporting our president. Working for the good of the nation.” And Sally knows she’s done. She’s back in the fold. Trapped again.
“You are freaking spectacular.” I’m so uncomfortable.
“I trusted my career to you and you destroyed it.” But he TRIED, David. Still, good call.
“She told you there was a bomb on the plane, but it was a lie…She fooled you like she fooled me.” She’s an international terrorist, y’all. Maybe don’t trust her.
“B6-13 is not an individual. Cut off the head of the snake and another will grow in its place. Remember that, Mr. President.” Yeaaah, Rowan won this round. Pretty soundly.
“If it wasn’t for Olivia, I would have peeled off all of your skin.” Tell us how you really feel, Huck.
“I’m standing here afraid and in my underwear and without my soul, asking you what – what happens now?” But, like, Jeff Perry in this scene, you guys.
“The plane never made it to Hong Kong.” Oop.
“I loved you. Whatever happens next, I want you to know that I loved you. I love you.” This feels like the end for Jake and Olivia, but I am SO NOT READY TO LET GO.
“Daniel Douglas is in hell.” Which is funny, because Daniel is one of the few characters on this show not to have directly/undirectly committed one-to-several heinous murders.
“You kill someone, you call me.” Could he have handled this better than Cyrus? I wonder.
Hey, it’s Charlotte from The Lizzie Bennet Diaries! Hey, gurl.
“Go ahead. Listen…Yeah. That’s the vice president.” Thanks, NSA!
“The answers you are so desperate for. You’re never going to get them. Not from me.” Is Rowan still trying to protect the secrets of Wonderland or is he now (and has always been?) more concerned about protecting Liv? Is he a GOOD guy? I mean, after that monologue to Fitz, I want to erect a monument to him, but…
“If you’d like a job here at Wonderland, we can have you take an aptitude test.” No, no, no, no! Jake is now Command! He can’t stay pure and good!
“That’s what happens now. You name me White House Press Secretary.” James is going to be my SECOND favorite fictional press secretary of all time, I’m sure.
“Don’t worry, sweetheart. I’ll see you real soon.” Yikesssss.
Happy holidays, Gladiators! May your season be free of government kidnappings; dental tracking devices; and letter-opener stabbings. What did you think of “A Door Marked Exit?” Leave it in the comments!