“Is Josh Free in Two Weeks?”
Posted by Sage
There’s an episode of Friends where Joey and Phoebe argue over whether there is any charitable deed that can be done without the doer gaining something for themselves, even if it’s just a sense of satisfaction. (“I WILL find a selfless good deed. Because I just gave birth to three children and I will not let them be raised in a world where Joey is right.”) In this week’s Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, various friends and one stranger pitch in to save Rebecca’s whirlwind wedding. And even if their actions are tinged with a little selfishness, they still make Rebecca feel like what she’s always wanted to be: a normal girl. Like you see on Pinterest.
Let’s talk about the four patron saints of the #bunchofchans nuptials, starting with a protective best friend:
Paula
Patrick
Rebecca is piling her planning stress onto the unassuming delivery guy, but she’s also using him to air out some guilt. The only three people who know about Rebecca and Nathaniel’s elevator kiss are Rebecca, her “foine” boss, and now, Patrick. She can’t tell anyone else lest they try to make her see reason and cancel this misguided attempt to love Josh more than she does. Patrick can be objective. Patrick can tell her she’s going to be fine. “Tell Me I’m Okay, Patrick” is a song that wouldn’t sound out of place in the score of Promises, Promises and speaks to any of us who have looked for validation in strange places because we don’t dare asking the people we should.
*I don’t know why men in shorts are so funny, but they are.
We find out later that Patrick also delivers to the law office, so he knows right where to go when Rebecca’s problems become too much for him. He’s the messenger who tells Paula that her friend is afraid to tell her how overwhelmed she is. He needs relief, but also it’s an act of kindness. And Paula’s reaction tells Patrick he did the right thing. Mama Paula always makes it better.


Valencia




Meanwhile, the lead-up to this wedding is beginning to resemble the last throes of Valencia and Josh’s relationship. The church basketball league has become an unexpected source of temptation. Josh is hitting it off with a fellow coach, who eats up his stories about how he’s being mistreated by his fiance. Josh likes to curry sympathy by eliminating the parts of the narrative where he screwed up. So Josh tells Sara that Rebecca is boxing him out of the wedding (hey, basketball metaphors!) and leaves out the part where he fell asleep when they were supposed to be making the paper crane decorations that HE requested. Sara pats him on the head and tells him what he wants to hear: that he needs to assert himself and demand to be a part of the planning. Josh dubs her “chill.” It’s the same distinction he made between Valencia and Rebecca right before he left the former for the latter. Ruh roh.


Joke’s on Sara, because Josh is wearing that forest green tux over Valencia’s dead body. (“What are you wearing, by the way? You look like the guest of honor at a park ranger gala.”) Heather inadvertently alerts Valencia to the tragic situation over at their house when she comes over seeking “wines.” A visit to check on Rebecca’s progress calls to Valencia’s organized soul. (“Did you murder a wedding?”) As a Monica, she cannot let this happen. And thus Rebecca’s predicament becomes the purpose that pulls Valencia out of her rut. Unlike those wussy wedding planners who told Rebecca that two weeks wasn’t enough, Valencia calmly takes the reins of Rebecca and Josh’s special day and fairy godmothers the shit out of it, under a very tight schedule. She looks like a woman who’s found her element. I don’t know how many weddings there are to plan in West Covina, but V made have found her new career. And she would ABSOLUTELY crush that J. Lo black pantsuit look.
Nathaniel


Again I ask, can we keep him? Scott Michael Foster fits so perfectly into this ensemble, it feels like he’s been with us forever.
Nathaniel learned another lesson about tolerating personal weakness in this episode. And we’re in a time in American history where most of us couldn’t be less interested in the problems of privileged straight white men, so my boundless sympathy for Nathaniel is a credit to the writing and the performance.
He calls them weirdos, but Nathaniel has as many quirks as his employees do. They’ve been exposed to a lot of them by now, so Maya is the only person there who’s still a little scared of him. Nathaniel finds out for certain that he’s one of the freaks when a homemade broccoli/cauliflower/Thai mung bean smoothie does something nasty to his bowels. But he doesn’t believe in sick days, even for the most serious maladies. (“In fact, most cancers are half-day.”) From the show that brought you “Period Sex” comes hot guy in a suit shitting his pants in front of two female coworkers. Nathaniel’s determination to be the paragon of manliness and discipline that his father is leads to utter humiliation. But now he’s in a place where humiliation is kind of the standard. Nathaniel pooping at his desk may not even be the most insane thing to happen at the office this WEEK. And though Paula, Darryl, and the rest of them have every right to hold a grudge against this guy, they do what they can do help him out. Paula even offers to roll him to the bathroom. That’s a friend.
The elder Plimpton picks the worst possible day to drop in on his protege. He’s hardass and mocks them, but Nathaniel is THEIRS, so Paula intercepts Mr. Plimpton and tries like hell to warn her boss of his arrival. It’s too late. His father catches Nathaniel napping and is disgusted by what he sees.
That’s what in Nathaniel’s heart when he hears that Rebecca’s dad isn’t making the trip to see her get married. When someone so close to you is that withholding, it can be a never-ending struggle to let go of your need for their approval. (“I only invited him to feel bad about myself.”) Nathaniel hears the way Rebecca talks about her dad: with high hopes and low expectations. She makes excuses for him when other people judge. This is all very familiar, so Nathaniel goes and does a wonderful, wonderful thing. He sends a private plane for Rebecca’s dad and stands silently behind her while she greets her deadbeat father like he’s the best guy she’s ever known. She’s stunned by the gesture. (“I know what it’s like to care about your dad and what he thinks. Even if you wish you didn’t.”) Talk about taking your own pain and making something beautiful out of it.


Friendly reminder that Nathaniel and Rebecca still haven’t gotten each other out of their systems and this little stunt just makes it worse. If Greg doesn’t show up tonight, I hereby give Nathaniel full permission to pull a Ben Braddock in the middle of this wedding instead.
The Situation’s Actually A Lot More Nuanced Than That
- “So open source. Thanks Dust and Sash.”
- “I mean, that’s a good-ass hashtag.”
- Nathaniel’s reaction to Maya’s psoriasis was inspired.
- I thought the green tux was pretty cute, but what do I know?
- A Sugar Ray cover band called Splenda Ray.
- My heart grew half a size when Patrick covered a sleeping Rebecca with a stray wedding gown.
- “Don’t forget: I know what gluten does to your face.”
- “You’re the Labrador. And he’s the owner.”
- !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’m hoping for Trent, Nathaniel, and Greg to show up to stop the wedding. At the very least I’ll take a reference to whether or not Greg knows about the wedding.
I had a genuine *premonition* last night that the ‘Big Surprise Ending’ is going to be a suicide attempt. If it actually happens I’m going to change jobs & become a psychic. We’ll find out in 1 1/2 hours.
First, the hot guy shitting his pants epitomizes why I love this show. That and what you point out about Rebecca and Valencia’s relationship.
Second, nope, I don’t think the wedding’s going to happen, and I can’t wait to see the disaster unfold.