Sometimes, plans get thwarted in this game. Secrets get leaked, someone who absolutely, positively should not win the veto wins the veto, and the target on your back gets bigger for all the wrong reasons. But sometimes, the stars align, and your plans to make a power move go off without a hitch. This week, we got our first backdoor of the season, sending one alliance scrambling to figure out what the hell to do next. We had a pretty badass undercover flip of the eviction vote. And we have a new HOH that could go in a million different directions. People are really starting to play the game, and I am here for it.
It was a WEEK this week, so let’s break it all down.
Tyler tells Kaitlyn F.O.U.T.T.E. doesn’t trust her. Maybe they don’t trust her because of the way she fought for this ridiculous alliance name. Honestly, it would be valid if it was.
“I can’t wait to start picking out people who are not serving me in this game.” I need more people to start serving this kind of bloodsport realness in the house. We deserve it.
“I am the best dressed guy in the house.” SWAGGY. 99% of your wardrobe consists of t-shirts that have the nickname YOU GAVE YOURSELF printed on them. Take a step back.
So far, the only thing that I know Rachel has done in this house is shave JC’s back. I legitimately forgot you existed in this house. Are you sure you should be here?
I’m weirdly impressed with Tyler’s game right now? His HOH hiccup and looking like Frank aside, it’s kind of amazing how he’s taken to playing both sides of the house and leading Kaitlyn over to his side.
Kaitlyn wants to backdoor Swaggy. YES. THIS is what I’m looking for, power moves all around. Put up your pawns. Make their hearts fall out of their butts. Keep me entertained.
Hamazon delivers Faysal’s final package, because it’s still a thing. And it’s still disgusting. And I’m running out of ham gifs. So thanks for ending that one at the right time, Big Brother.
Rachel is the least trending houseguest of the week. Maybe because all she’s done so far is shave JC’s back.
(Rachel picks Yell!, in which an angry reviewer will be unleashed for 24 hours to critique her game. Oh my god, please make this fun.)
“Well, America, thanks for keeping me mediocre.” Okay, I low key love Rockstar, and I need her to do more things in this game, because I feel like she would be super entertaining. Someone light a fire under her.
Every time Swaggy says he deserves the power and doesn’t get it, an angel gets its wings. That’s it. That’s all I have to say.
Tyler gets top trending houseguest. And I’m honestly not mad? The turnaround on this guy is incredible. He picks The Cloud, which keeps him from going on the block at any one nomination ceremony or veto. And it’s good for TWO MONTHS. HOLY HELL. When did we start saying, “Fuck it, just keep this forever?”
Kaitlyn’s senses tell her that Scottie has the new power. Girl…your senses mispronounced “Tyler.”
“No matter what happens, I’m doing this for the highest good.” That is definitely not something you say when you want to keep your backdoor plans a secret. Great job, Kaitlyn.
Kaitlyn nominates Scottie and Winston for eviction. Let the backdooring commence.
Kaitlyn wants Faysal to throw the POV comp, even though she picked him with Houseguest’s Choice. And the reasons she gives Faysal for it don’t really fly. And I’m not quite sure why she picked one of the stronger players from her alliance if she doesn’t want the veto in his hands. But just wait, because this is apparently the first of many times I get confused by her interactions with the rest of F.O.U.T.T.E. this week.
WHY ARE JESSICA AND CODY HERE?! NO. STOP IT. Why are we still enabling this transphobic asshole robot? Were Jeff and Jordan just busy this week?
At least they kept the mechanical sound effects, though. So if I have to see him on my TV again (ugh), I guess it’s nice that they’re throwing me a bone here.
Oh my god, these dating video intros for the POV comp are ridiculous. But part of me appreciates this show for going the extra mile?
Holy shit, Boogie is 47?! BB2 feels like it was only a couple years ago, this is impossible. Oh my god, am I old? Are we old now? How did we let this happen?
“I’m a fan of essential oils, meditation, and the backdoor.” Guys…I feel like this comp just made the case for calling it something other than backdooring?
Kaitlyn is…not great at this. Like, I know there’s a time crunch and you want to win this thing so you can carry out your plan, but damn.
“My name’s Winston. I’m 28 years old, and I’m not dating Brett.” Why am I not surprised that he took it to the “No Homo” place? Blergh.
“You’ve got to be kidding me…you’ve got to be kidding me…you’ve got to be kidding me.” Winston…you’ve GOT to get more phrases in your lexicon.
Tyler wins POV, and I just love when a blindside starts coming together.
Rachel’s angry reviewer looks like Matt Foley, Motivational Speaker, and I can’t handle it. I want to know how much this guy got paid just to scream at Rachel for 24 hours. Is it a cushy gig?
Kaitlyn’s trying to prep her alliance members for the POV ceremony without telling them what she plans to do, and it’s so painful to watch. I get wanting to keep the replacement nominee a secret, but you’re seriously burning your bridges before you have to.
Tyler uses the POV on Scottie, and Kaitlyn names Swaggy as the replacement nominee. And now…we wait.
Kaitlyn declares F.O.U.T.T.E. over since she blindsided everyone by putting up Swaggy. Okay, good. Let’s never speak of this alliance name ever again..
“This is probably one of the biggest moves in Big Brother history.” I mean, it’s only the second eviction. And this is nowhere near the level of, say, Dan Gheesling’s funeral for himself in BB14, or basically all of Dr. Will’s gameplay during BB2. Know. Your. History. And then come back to me with your thoughts.
Kaitlyn is upset that she’s taking Swaggy’s dream away from him. Um…did you miss the day where they teach you that this is the entire fucking point of the game?
Did Swaggy seriously admit to using the story of how his dad died as strategy to stay in this house? That’s a level of disgusting I never thought I’d have to see again. (Remember BB12, when Matt told the house his wife had some kind of terminal illness when she definitely did not have a terminal illness? Yeah.)
Sam briefly considers using her power for Swaggy. GIRL NO. NO. WHAT ARE YOU DOING. THINK ABOUT THIS FOR A SECOND.
When did Brett get a mustache? Is this what happens when I ask you to pick a better identity? Because stop it.
SCOTTIE VOTES TO EVICT SWAGGY WHILE WEARING A SWAGGY C SHIRT. AND HE CALLED HIM BY HIS GIVEN NAME. WHAT A FUCKING BALLER MOVE. Remember how I said we should maybe watch out for this dude because the premiere set him up to be the next Ian? At this moment, I totally stand by that.
Aaaaannnnd Swaggy C is out of here with an eight vote majority. And Sam didn’t use her power app. Cue the collective sigh of relief.
The BB App Store is open for the third and final time. I’m really glad we can take “Crap App” out of our vocabulary soon.
Scottie is the new HOH, and considering how he low key stabbed Swaggy C and F.O.U.T.T.E. in the back, and how his closest ally was gone the first week, I’m really excited to see where this goes. Because I literally have no idea.
What did you think of Kaitlyn’s HOH reign? And what the actual fuck is Scottie going to do with all this power? Let’s chat in the comments.
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