Here’s a conundrum: how the hell has Faysal made it so long in this game? No, seriously, HOW?! I just want to know the sequence of thoughts in his head–after seeing how horrible Haleigh’s HOH reign went and sitting through an ally’s eviction on his side’s week of power–that made his obvious conclusion, “Yeah, let’s work to get another one of our numbers out of the house.” He puts his trust in someone who consistently votes with the other side, targets his ally for reasons that are either irrelevant or imaginary, and still thinks he’s doing a good job in this game. I am just…I don’t even know what I am at this point.
But I guess congratulations are in order. Faysal succeeded in making me rage quit Big Brother After Dark for the week because I couldn’t handle this much stupidity before bed. That’s never happened before. Good job, sir.
I literally just want whatever camera is focused on JC during the HOH comp and no other angles. I’m not a huge fan of him, but I am a huge fan of him falling all over the place during endurance challenges.
Faysal wins HOH. Look, according to the spoiler blogs, this comp was over like 20 minutes after the live show ended. This comp is NOT supposed be that quick; it’s technically an endurance comp. But props to Big Brother for drawing out the HOH segment and making it look like it actually took a hot second?
“I’m confident Fessy will keep me safe.” Okay, yeah, Scottie, tell me more about how that’s going to work.
Scottie tells Haleigh that he was the one vote, and she believes him. Not that it’s going to do any good, but at least it’s something.
JC and Brett have a plan to make everyone believe Brett was the sole vote. Oh god, here we go.
“I have no loyalty towards Scottie.” EVEN THOUGH HE’S ON YOUR SIDE OF THE HOUSE. FAYSAL. Do you know how this game works?
Faysal considers putting Brett and Tyler on the block for a minute. Which is honestly the perfect plan because there’s enough of Level Six left in the house that, if any one of them won the veto, there’s still a way to have two members on the block, so you know that the other side of the house loses a number. It’s a no-brainer.
Brett “confesses” to being the sole vote after Scottie says it was him. Kaycee explodes and lies all over the place, while Scottie tries to keep his cool. Look, call me crazy, but making an unnecessarily huge deal about something you’re lying about is kind of a dead giveaway. Just a thought.
“Brett doesn’t seem too confident when he says he was the one vote to save Rockstar.” Jesus god, please go with that, Faysal. PLEASE. Put those very obvious pieces together.
JC tells Haleigh that Scottie likes her. She’s not buying it, but Faysal totally is when they take it to him. Holy mother of god.
Haleigh’s trying to talk Faysal out of putting Scottie up. Which shouldn’t be an exercise in futility, but expect the unexpected, I guess.
“He’s doing all this shady shit.” -Faysal about Scottie. BUT HE’S NOT, THOUGH. HE LITERALLY DID ONE THING SIX WEEKS AGO. Come on, man.
Faysal nominates Brett and Scottie for eviction. For the love of god, this week is the worst.
Scottie: “Fess is either fantastic at this game at a level I can’t comprehend, or he sucks.” I’ll take option B, please.
“I don’t even know what’s going on with you, sometimes.” -Faysal to Haleigh. DUDE. The objective of this game is to not alienate yourself from literally anyone willing to help you make it further.
Faysal wants to work with Tyler and Angela. I mean, you probably should have thought of that before two months went by in this game, but okay.
IT’S ZINGBOT, BABY. Honestly, it’s one of the best days of the summer. And I love how the houseguests are flipping the fuck out when they KNOW this thing is about to tear them apart.
Zingbot starts off by calling Angela heartless, emotionless, and soulless. Guys, this robot did not come to play, and I am so here for it.
“Brett, you always seem so fresh and clean, which makes sense, because you’re a giant douche.” Oh my god, this was so well-crafted and beautiful. Whoever wrote for Zingbot this year was inspired.
“Fessy, I was surprised to learn you’re a part-time teacher, considering you’re a full-time moron. Every child left behind.” EVERY. CHILD. LEFT. BEHIND. This was so savage and so beautiful. I love you, Zingbot.
It’s Hide and Go Veto. Look, it’s fun to watch the houseguests destroy the place. But I’m also very big on my spaces being organized, and the thought of having to clean up that disaster gives me secondhand anxiety.
Fessy’s first time out, and he misses the folder that’s literally right in the pillow he’s staring at in the have not room. So he’s going to be great at this.
Scottie deliberately makes the floors a slippery mess. How have we gone through so many years of this comp, and this is the first time I can remember someone doing this? It may be a safety hazard, but it’s brilliant.
Brett immediately slips and falls. Bless you, Scottie.
“I don’t think you should go inside. I don’t want you to have a heart attack.” -JC to Sam. Honestly, good call on giving her a warning, because to go into that house without knowing the damage is terrifying.
Brett wins the veto. Ugh. Just…ugh.
The house is a straight up disaster after the comp. And this would be the part where I self-evict so I don’t have to deal with this mess.
Scottie thinks he could stay over Haleigh. Honestly? It might have been a possibility. But to be up against Haleigh this week would require hell freezing over, so…
Scottie convinces Sam to talk to Faysal about putting up Haleigh as a replacement nominee. WHICH SHE DOES. And then when that doesn’t work, Scottie tries to throw Sam under the bus during his veto speech to get her put up as a replacement nominee. I’m just stunned and so confused.
(It’s been a hot second since I’ve been able to use this one, I missed your face, Alyssa Edwards.)
Brett sets a goddamn fire trying to cook bacon in the oven. Okay, first thing’s first: obviously I’m glad it was small and no one was hurt. Second thing’s second: I am amazed at how not surprised I am that Brett can’t cook bacon.
Scottie is evicted from the house and becomes the third member of the jury. It’s also the first unanimous vote of the season, and while this week has been a little bit of a shitshow, I do love the fact that BB20 has been interesting enough that we basically made it to the two-month mark without everyone voting with the house. So much for Scottie being the next Ian Terry, though.
There are 4 minutes left for the HOH comp, and like 3 of those minutes are Chenbot explaining how to play. And I must have tuned out for a second, because I do not understand what they’re supposed to do, send help.
Next week is the Jury Battle Back comp. Okay, yeah, this is exciting, but what I would really like is a good old-fashioned double eviction. What gives, Big Brother? Did Kaitlyn failing the Bonus Life comp really mess up the schedule THAT much?
Were you as frustrated as I was over Faysal’s HOH week? Let’s vent in the comments.