This is Us Season 4, Episode 3
“Unhinged”
Posted by Shannon
I’ve spent a lot of time yelling about friendship in This Is Us over the years. Almost exclusively, I’m speaking of their lack. It’s not unusual for family shows to have a tendency to dismiss or disregard the family that doesn’t come from blood. Madison and Kate and Jack and Miguel have been the stand-out examples within the show so far, and still Miguel joins the family later down the line. So while we have a long way to go, I’m happy to note that this week the theme (such as it is) moves towards friendships. Yes, a few have family as their base (looking at you, Tess and Deja and Nicky and Kevin) but it’s a step in the right direction. We just have to cross our fingers that these new friends turn out for the best.
Jack and Rebecca
Seventh grade is practically an elaborate torture simulation. The ONLY thing that makes it liveable is a strong support system; while the Big Three at this age aren’t as tight knit as they are in the modern timeline, the link is always there. It’s rarely more obvious than it is in this week’s episode, with Randall starting school ahead of his siblings. While Kate does a workout video with her mom and Kevin claims a “me day,” Randall is practically skipping back into the halls of his classroom.
I’m going to do a hefty bit of assuming here, but I don’t think any of it is out of line, so bear with me. When Randall sneaks his fancy Air Jordans out of his backpack and wears them proudly, it’s not that he’s trying to be a rebel. Randall and rebellion do not go hand in hand. It’s all a show for Mr. Lawrence, his new teacher and – I’m guessing – the first black teacher Randall has had in all three years of this fancy school of his. Not much is said in this scene and yet so much is there. Mr. Lawrence is in his first year, and I’m willing to bet he’s feeling as anxious and out of place as Randall was a few years ago. There are no other kids of color in his classroom, and whether it’s out of overcorrecting lest he be blamed for favoritism or if he really thinks he’s doing Randall a solid – maybe some combination of both – Mr. Lawrence can’t let the break in dress code stand. (“You wanna be in a place like this, you gotta look the part.”)
Mr. Lawrence had no way of knowing that the kid he was singling out could not be more of a rule follower. (And even if he did, I doubt he’d have behaved differently.) Randall falls into a panic attack immediately. His parents would have to sign the slip to acknowledge the issue, which would mean an interrogation, which would also mean Randall needing to admit some of the more complicated feelings of alienation that he’d rather protect his parents from. Still, he calls home, mostly because he doesn’t know what else to do.
Even at this age, Kevin is pretty great in a crisis. Sure, he’s a little whiny, but when the chips are down he’s there. Kevin can hear the panic in his brother’s voice. It’s not just that Kevin knows how it feels to be in trouble (“do you want mom in a hurry or mom before bed?”), it’s that he knows Randall can’t bear the weight of what would come next. And maybe part of him is remembering his lesson from the pool; that he is, and always will be, a good person. One who keeps his eye on those that he loves. And who instinctively knows the importance of seeing someone who looks like you on TV with your family by your side.
The adult side of this timeline is finding their way into trouble, too. I was reminded recently of the fact that this job is part of what drove Jack to drink; an environment when a single mistake in an otherwise impeccable record lands in firing just gives more weight to Jack’s professional misery. Yes, it’s a $20,000 mistake (yeesh), but Jack comes clean immediately. He takes ownership, tries to handle it in the best possible way, and still he’s written off. The only thing that saves him is Miguel, swooping in to storm the castle and threatening to walk too – along with his significant client base. That level of loyalty is precisely the kind of thing that makes me harp on the importance of friendships in media. It’s unquestioning, unwavering, unstoppable. I’m so curious to see just HOW this friendship, which we saw forming years ago in a retail store, evolved into this ride or die connection. But regardless of how they got here, they’re in it now. And just like the friendships we all hold tight, they are so lucky to have each other.
Randall and Beth
If Deja, Tess and Annie are the next generation of the Big Three (and they are), then it only makes sense for Randall and Jae-won to be the next Miguel and Jack. These two are taking District 12 by storm and it’s getting significant attention: especially their new plan for Mondays. Randall has literally taken his office door off the hinges and is holding court with his constituents instead of spending time with the council.
I wanted to love this. I really did. I want to be 110% behind Randall and Jae-won taking over the council and doing it their way. It’s so important for Randall to hear what the people who live in his district think – everything from potholes and school boards to dysfunctional bus lines. But there IS a middle ground between their “burn it all down” mentality and that of Bernice – who is, truth be told, a bit of a caricature of an old school politician’s staffer. While being dismissive of Randall’s strategy and calling it a “stunt” is seriously unprofessional, and while it was WAY out of line suggesting Randall fire Jae-won, there was space for both of their governance plans. Bernice was partially correct when she reminded Randall that he’s a politician and not a therapist. His constituents are the most important thing, but without getting his other council members on his side, Randall won’t be able to get a damn thing done.
Back at the house, Beth is getting ready for the grand opening of her dance studio and holding down the first days of school for the girls, complete with chicken parm and Zendaya jokes. It’s a mixed bag, though. Annie seems fine but Tess is clearly holding back, and Deja’s crush takes the opportunity to swing by and get ahead of his parenthood before someone else does it for him. I was relieved to get this out of the way sooner rather than later; it speaks to Malik’s maturity and it gives Deja the opportunity to process fairly and thoughtfully, rather than uncovering it later in some horrible dramatic reveal.
Still, it’s heavy. I loved the opportunity this gave both Tess and Annie to have a bit of a heart to heart – though the dialogue was lacking for me. With a few rare exceptions, it just didn’t feel like a conversation two teen girls would have with each other. And I certainly don’t mean that Tess wouldn’t open up about her struggles to be out at school or that Deja wouldn’t confide in her; quite the opposite. That felt completely in character for both of the girls, and I really hope we get more conversations like this. But the best moments of this scene were the little, quiet character touches like Tess laughing “step moms!” at Deja, or Deja insisting that Tess come clean about what’s bothering her. The details of Tess reminding Deja that she was “complicated” when she showed up just didn’t ring true. But the performance saved the day, and I’m pulling for more – and better written – scenes just like this one.
Kevin and Nicky
I doubted last week if Kevin had entirely walked out of the new movie, or if he’d just made a quick stop over to see his Uncle Nicky before diving back into his work. I shouldn’t have doubted him. Kevin is hanging out with Nicky full-time, for better or worse. It is, at least, a positive for Nicky; as we trace his steps to throwing the chair through the window, we can see just how far he’d come in his sobriety and mental health work before yet another set back in the form of a reassigned therapist. It’s tricky, this. Therapist relationships are delicate and intimate things. I can absolutely understand Nicky losing it in frustration after finally making so many steps forward, only to feel like the rug has been pulled out from under him. However. His behavior is his responsibility, and his alone. And dragging Kevin along with him to a bar was not a high water moment for his character.
Speaking of complicated feelings about one’s character development…
While Kevin chatted with Cassidy’s son, eating snacks and playing Mario Cart, I was taken with just how far Kevin has come. He has tracked through every season with one (or more) new, impactful relationship, and while he’s always been looking for something more substantive than he’d want you to believe, there are little changes every time. Small moments of growth, of maturity. I’m extremely proud of him, and I love the idea of him striking up a relationship with a woman who thinks he was on Who’s the Boss, of all things. But I do wish the show would take a step back and let Kevin be alone for a while. Let him truly sit with himself and his thoughts, with his family, with his recovery. Maybe even – say it with me now – make a friend. And maybe it still will. But I can’t help feeling like Cassidy is endgame, and as much as I’m behind that in theory I’m a little sad we got there without Kevin settling into himself alone first.
And while I’m discussing things I like in theory but wish were executed just a little differently – what in the damn hell was with this laughing fit at the meeting? Sure, Kevin’s fears about hitting Jowl City at 50 were a little absurd, but who among us hasn’t had an objectively dumb thought be the trigger for a really horrible spiral? And yes, I get what they’re trying to do. There’s a feeling of rebellion and camaraderie in a badly timed giggle fit. It provides a genuine bonding moment between Cassidy and Nicky. But there were a million ways to get to the same endpoint. This burst of laughter wasn’t earned. It was cruel. And that’s not in any one of these characters’ natures.
Kate and Toby
Just as I was grateful that Malik’s daughter wasn’t dragged out for Deja, I’m relieved to have this whole “Toby’s been working out in the dead of night” thing out in the open. While this storyline felt odd to me at first, I can understand Toby feeling like he had a secret that just got out of hand. When Toby takes Kate along with him on a business lunch, complete with his new fancy suit, the evidence of his changing body is shockingly clear to her. This whole thing could have gone so wrong – and I’d argue that season one Toby would have made a horrific mess of things, and that I’d have to spend this entire section rampaging about how subtly emotionally abusive he was being. But Toby’s character has long since been rescued. Every single step of the way, he’s supportive, thoughtful, and 100% Team Kate.
That said, Kate’s own mental health hasn’t been as much of a focus lately, but I certainly hope they’re going to start being a little more focused on how she’s processing all of this. Having Jack and moving homes are two giant changes that Kate would need to unpack – much less handling Jack’s lack of vision and Toby’s triggering reaction to parenthood. Kate’s reaction to Toby’s gym routine is fair enough, but she’s absolutely projecting. Lest we forget, Toby had a heart attack just a few short years ago, and it’s within character for him to want to make a change. It’s a minor miracle of both writing and performance that he delivers this factually without a hint of an attack at Kate, but she still takes it as such, and after that situation at lunch who could blame her? She cannot possibly be expected to handle all this on her own. Consider this my updated #GetAllThePearsonsToTherapy2k19.
Hindsight is 20/20, and from the first moment that this neighbor came out being nasty, I should have known he’d have a deeper sob story. There is not a Pearson on this earth who has found a bitchy side character without immediately hearing about their life story. I’m ultimately endeared by this guy in spite of myself, and so is Kate. That said. I’ve seen some rumblings online about this neighbor ending up as a potential affair for Kate – please consider this my FULL-THROATED plea to not let that happen. Kate deserves MULTIPLE friends, and one of them can even be a man. I love the thought of these two wandering around the block together, sharing stories and helping each other. So please please PLEASE let’s not wreck it with an affair. Please.
Colors of the Painting
- Someone get me a gif of baby Kevin yelling “this is interrupting my me time!”, for it is my permanent state of being.
- “We are not here to talk about him, we are here to talk about database servers and all your other IT needs.” Toby. I feel so seen.
- One of my favorite musical themes of This Is Us is Nicky’s, and I didn’t realize how much I missed it.
- I would absolutely watch a TNT procedural about closing IT deals and I am not sorry.
- Truth be told, this felt like a nothing episode. It was lots of running in place, lots of meh-level events that could have plugged in anywhere. It wasn’t bad, per say, there just wasn’t much to it. But every first half of a season needs a little filler, so let’s just hope this is as bad as it gets.
- I mean I can’t lie, I don’t hate it as a proposal song.
What did you think of “Unhinged”? Let us know in the comments.
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