This Place About To Blow-Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh – Scandal Gif-Cap

Scandal
Season 3, Episode 17: “Flesh and Blood”
Posted by Sage

This week on I Still Know What You Did Last Scandal, the dissolution of B6-13 brings lots of people who want each other dead together under one roof. It’s six days until the election. Six days until Mellie has her “face pressed up against the glass of history.” (Calm down with those metaphors, Shondita.) Six days until Fitz gets his second term or Sally turns the country into the 4-year Director’s Cut of Jesus Camp. Mama Pope’s got a bomb, Papa Pope’s got a vendetta, and Quinn has her thigh-high stockings on, just in case. We’re as ready for this as we’ll ever be, so let’s get this party started.

“Did you really just…treason!?” Soooooo…what you’re saying is me dismantling the country’s most secret and powerful national security force WASN’T cool?

They can’t alert Homeland Security to the threat without blowing up the President’s spot, re: that whole plane crash thing. So?

“You mean the sacrifice of sleeping with me so you can hack into my phone?” Ah, the hardship.

“Really?” “Really?” David still can’t believe he somehow got himself involved with all these unstable individuals.

Rowan struts in to a James Brown score all, “Mr. President. How can I be of service?” The man’s got style.

Like Maya/Marie, Dominic Bell is a terrorist for hire. Hardly anyone on this show, good or bad, is driven by any kind of idealogy.

“I’m doing this for me.” Rowan has a score to settle.

Brian McKenzie and Quinn are being all domestic again. It’s disturbing as balls.

“Command. Other command.” Awkwaaaard.

Jake and Rowan are bickering like children. Draining whatever faith anyone in that room has of this operation being successful.

“So. Are you guys like, an item now?” Leave it to Abby to say what everyone else is thinking.

“He will break your bones and step over your body on the way in.” Jake is having none of Olivia’s hero worship of her dad.

“You think he’s your dad, but that’s just a part he’s playing.”

Meanwhile, Leo’s having secret meetings behind the bleachers with a cute little field hockey girl. Errrmmm…

Sally and Fitz are having a tug of war over who gets to score political points by giving Senator Hightower’s eulogy. As is befitting the legacy of someone we’re told was a legitimately a  great man. Sigh.

“Ya’ll tell me what you decide. Either way, I get to stand by my man.” Drunk and Over It Mellie>>>>

Sexy ladies, arming a bomb! Pencil skirts and bad intentions! 

Quinn is weirdly ping-ponging back and forth between Huck and Brian McKenzie and when will this eeeeennnnndddd?

“The man was a soldier on the battle lines of immigration.” Wait, wait, wait: there are people in this town who are actually making policy?

“I’m telling you I’m losing.” “I’m telling you I’m black. Sally doesn’t have the NAACP.” Best line of the night, obviously.

“If you’re dead, how am I supposed to-“ GURL.

“I miss you.” Ru has a message for you, Fitz:

“They love me in Flint.” I bet they do.

Cyrus probably shouldn’t be on the phone to schmooze donors.

Harrison calls Rowan Papa Pope! Talk about misreading a room.

“I found him. He’s heavy.” And Quinn’s giving Huck a look that says, “Heeeeyyyyy….”

Field hockey girl is seducing Jerry! Which takes about .5 seconds, cause he’s in high school.

She delivers Leo a paper bag that presumably contains a full condom. Which the US News & World Report college issue ranks right under a diverse list of extracurriculars as a foolproof way of getting into Harvard.

“Just because I sell you a canvas doesn’t mean I know where you’re going to hang it.” Dominic is an ar-TISTE, y’all.

“Question him, don’t hurt him.” Mmmm-hmmm.

Leo and Sally are gonna run a paternity test on Jerry! Hope Fitz is getting that dance ready.

“You’d have to be an idiot to be this reckless. And you are not an idiot.” YES. Mellie and Olivia respecting each other! Break away from these toxic men!!! GO OUT THELMA AND LOUISE STYLE.

“I want his head in the fire and I want to see him burn.” I’M ON BOARD.

“I have lived this lie for 15 years.” Our sad queen!

“IT IS MY TURN.” Yaaasssss!

David finds Jake sitting in his office. Jake berates him while also soliciting his help in locating Maya/Marie.

“Who is he?” “Dominic Bell is the only man your mother ever loved.” A dead man.

Rowan challenges Dominic to a little old fashioned game of Russian Roulette. And I couldn’t find a good gif of that scene in The X-Files, so Christopher Walken will have to do.

Rowan shoots Dominic in the head. Out of spite.

“As long as you’re useful, no one’s gonna kill you.” Weekly prayer to St. Shonda that NOTHING, NOTHING, NOTHING ever befall Abby and David.

“How is she?” “You’re despicable.” Hey, Abby.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
………..
I love you so much.

“The DNA’s not a match.” “Yes, it is.” “Yes, it is.” Olivia pays off the lab tech when Mellie decides not to destroy Fitz’s world. Yet.

“I was there in that bed with you last night….That wasn’t you handling with me. That was us.” He could feel it. In Olivia’s lady parts.

“Tell me you felt it too. Tell me I’m not crazy.”

Olivia remembers Dominic as a man who Maya/Marie would sit with while Olivia was at the playground. Terrorist housewives need love and excitement too.

“You are not your mother.” “I know that. Don’t you think I know that?”

“It feels like betrayal.” “It feels like a first step.” She’s a lost cause, Jake. Save yourself.

Sally’s leading in the polls…

…because Fitz has had to cancel all his campaign events and is just loitering around the White House with Cyrus.

“Olivia’s not gonna like this.” “Olivia’s not here.” And you better not go telling.

“It was Dominic Bell who told your mother to marry me.” Yeah, that hurts.

“You two go talk or punch each other or make out, whatever. I don’t care. Meanwhile, I’ll be disposing of the body by myself, in peace.” She’s right. She’s a stone-cold lunatic, but she’s right.

“Cyrus, why do I hear chopper blades?”

“Your mother will not kill the president if it means killing you too.” Annnnd Olivia goes running to Fitz’s side, AGAIN.

“I can’t let you make that call.” Adnan emasculates Harrison yet again. I don’t hate it.

“Are you ready?” “To be blown up? Yes, Fitz.”

“Don’t be cute. You’re putting yourself and everyone in this auditorium at risk.” The leader of the free world, everybody!

“What do you want?” Huckleberry Quinn finally manifests in – what else? – rough parking garage sex. WHY DO THEY OPEN THEIR MOUTHS SO WIDE? ARE THEY TRYING TO SWALLOW EACH OTHER?

Maya/Marie strolls into OPA telling Rowan, “Bring my baby home.” He was right about her: Olivia is the only person in the world she loves.

David’s software finds Maya/Marie….leaving Senator Hightower’s office.  Just call her “Cause of Death: Heart Attack.”

The Defiance rally is evacuated, but the bomb isn’t at the school. It never was.

Olivia comes rushing back to OPA to find her father bloody (but still alive) on the ground – no sign of mom. Could we be losing Joe Morton already?? Say it ain’t so!

The bomb is really planted at the Senator’s funeral. Cyrus knows. He also knows that Sally is already there, shaking hands and kissing babies. He doesn’t call anyone. Also there? Hundreds of innocent people. And Andrew, who is too good for this world. Without James, Cyrus plunges completely into the dark.

Maya/Marie arms the bomb from a flip phone (okay?) and we’ve got one hour till boom.

What say you, Gladiators? Will Papa Pope live to monologue another day? Who’s doomed: Sally or Andrew or both or neither? How long must we wait for Olivia’s spine to grow back? If Kerry Washington goes into labor DURING a scene, do you think the crew will just put a giant fern in front of her and keep rolling? Let us know in the comments!